Wednesday, May 16, 2012

All Children Grow Up. Except [Two]

What's the most common question a bride is asked halfway through the engagement?

"How's the wedding planning going?"

This is a rather dangerous question to ask.  I'm sure the asker thinks it's a polite, generic question asked in an effort to feign genuine interest in the millions of details swirling through a bride's brain at any given moment.  The asker probably assumes that he'll receive a simple, "It's going well," a smile, and then he's off the hook and can move on to the next question.

Well, folks, I'm here to set the record straight:

Halfway-ish through the engagement, if you ask me "How's the wedding planning going?" you'd best be prepared for a good half-hour discussion on the mathematics involved in selecting bridesmaid dresses, the frustration of coordinating a kind-of-destination-wedding, strategies to find what you're looking for at an antique store, and tips and tricks for sewing bow ties [more on that later!], among other things.

I say half an hour because that's about how long I can go without pausing for a breath, at which point you can make a speedy escape.

Unless, of course, in your naivete, you contribute your thoughts on any of these topics, affording me the opportunity to inhale quickly before diving into my next lecture.

In an effort to save you some time, I've come up with a list of questions you can ask a bride nearing the halfway point of the engagement that won't commit you to any more than, say, 5 minutes worth of an answer.  The trick is to be specific, and stick to topics you're at least vaguely interested in.

-What does your dress look like?
-What are you colors?
-What shoes are you wearing?
-Have you picked a song for your first dance?
-Have you picked a hair style?
-Are you wearing a veil?
-Where are you going for your honeymoon?

That last one is really the best question, because everybody likes hearing about other people's vacations- it's a great opportunity to talk about your own favorite vacation spots or offer advice if you've visited the locale of choice.

So, Hive, go ahead- ask me.

"Where are you going for your honeymoon?"

I'm so glad you asked!

We're going to Walt Disney World!

Because we are, in fact, just a couple of kids.


From Disney's Peter Pan // image via Disney Screen Caps
I know, I know, Disney will NOT be a relaxing vacation, but Mr. Potion and I just aren't beach people- we both burn rather easily (especially me) and if we went to some sort of all-inclusive resort type place we'd probably spend the whole time just drinking at the pool, which we could do anywhere, really, without having to go some place expensive.  So while Disney won't be a laid-back, lounge-all-day honeymoon, it will be a lot of fun, and the kind of magic you can literally only experience at Disney.

We've been talking about a Disney honeymoon for as long as we've been talking about getting married, and that's...a long time.  To be honest, I'm not sure why we originally decided on it.  I know at one point we'd been tossing around the idea of going on a cruise around the Mediterranean, and I found one that lasts 30 days, which we both agreed would be pretty impossible to swing for a honeymoon (though it would be AWESOME).

Interesting aside: back-in-the-day, that's what a honeymoon was- a journey of a month or even longer during which the couple really got to know each other for the first time.  Wealthy couples, anyway- not-so-well-off couples didn't take a honeymoon at all, they just moved into their new home together.  Wealthy brides were also the only ones who wore white dresses, too, not because it symbolized purity, but because white fabric was expensive and keeping it white was even more expensive, and therefore it was a status symbol.  But I digress.

So, yes, DISNEY.  Are we crazy?  Perhaps.  Will it be expensive?  Hell yes.  Will it be worth it?  ABSOLUTELY.

Whenever wedding planning starts to feel stressful, or we go for a week without seeing each other because we're both so busy and therefore lament the fact that November feels so far away, we cheer ourselves up by chanting DISNEY DISNEY DISNEY and bouncing up and down.  (Okay I bounce up and down.  Mr. Potion isn't really one to bounce- he's never been a pre-teen girl and therefore doesn't have much practice.)  This has become our simple way of saying, "Yes, this wedding stuff is kind of ridiculous sometimes and we really just want to be married already, but all of this will be worth it when we get to spend a week in the happiest place on earth.

Where did you go for your honeymoon?  Would you ever consider such a labor-intensive honeymoon, or are you more of a sit-in-the-sand-with-a-drink person?  Does a theme park full of rowdy children just not scream "romance" to you, or do you see the adventure in it like we do?

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